In The Next Life
by Lex The Vampires Saviour
Summary: He wasn't meant to be there. He wasn't meant to see this. He wasn't meant to find me.   ...But at least he's here now. He can keep the cold away.    AkuRoku Angst. Because it's what I write best 8'D


A wince.  
Another cold, shudder inducing feeling.  
A sigh.  
Sudden feeling from the chest.  
A whimper.  
Eyes close and breathing slows.  
A groan.  
Arms lay limply out to the side.  
A gasp.  
Legs curl up, right on top of left. Left arm copies the movement onto it's companion. Back arches and folds in half. Head tucks into chin. A lone tear silently trickles down a paling cheek.

'It wasn't meant to end like _this_. It isn't **Fair**.'  
Was the basis of every thought circling around.  
He wasn't meant to feel. He didn't have a heart, so why could he feel it pounding in his chest. Why Was his breath stuttering when he breathed in. Why did it hurt so _freaking goddamned _much.  
He curls up into himself tighter, wraps his arms around his midsection and clutches at his cloak. Or what's left of it anyway. He grips a little more, as another flame rises and fades before his eyes, wishing there was another way that this could've ended.  
He runs though different scenarios, each one unique except for the ending. The ending he was currently going through.  
Another flame sparks up and into the air. Eyes latching onto it and fading a little more with the flame.  
This wasn't how he was meant to die.  
The Flurry of Dancing Flames, defeated, defenseless and _dying_. There was no flurry and no dancing but the flames...were they even flames...no.  
'They're pieces of my fire, my body ... me'  
The revalation brings more wet tracks cascading across his cheek, over the bridge of his nose and drips on to the mass of swirling colours. He blinks, seemingly startled by the motion and raises one gloved hand to wipe at the tear.

Nothing can help him now, he's decided as he rolls onto his back throwing his arms across his abdomen and flattens out his legs. Or well what's left of his legs. The flames the same obsidion as his cloak have risen in size and have started peeling away at his body. He can't feel anything further than his knees, not that he could in the first place, but when the first flame detached itself his body responded becoming hyperaware, he could _feel with no heart_. Numbness started to settle into his thighs and he knows at the rapid pace, he's being devoured by he'll be nothing in less than a mere hour.

He rasps out a chuckle. The sound's foreign in the silence of the vortex and bounces around the edges fading in and out of hearing. He contmemplates how bad being nothing is. He couldn't feel emotions or hot or cold. He couldn't tell you what love or companionship was. He couldn't even decribe hate. That left him with nothing but an empy mind full of straying thoughts he can't remember anyway.

Except One. The exception to everything a Nobody was taught. The one who he protected, fought with, laughed with, loved wholly and cried for. The one who put the beat, as cheesey as it sounded, back into his still heart. With him he could feel the heat of a touch, the taste of the sea and the sound of joy. Only he could make a Nobody feel like a Somebody.

He snorted. He would never allow them to see him in this state. He'd rather push them away than let them see him like this.

He closed his eyes and evened his breathing. Like this he felt as if he could be falling to sleep. The uncomfort of the flames just turned to a light haze and the numbness which had now started curling up to his groin wasn't as uncomfortable as it was when he was aware of it.  
Like this he could fall asleep and wake...no. Not wake. He'd stay as nothing, in nothing for as long as time continued on. His chest shuddering as it arched and fell back down became a soothing movement. And he fell into a light slumber.

He jerked awake. It didn't take much to pull him from sleep. Even in Castle Oblivion, the lightest step outside his door and he'd be up. Not going back to sleep until he knew it was safe.  
He placed his hands, palms flat to the floor, and leavered his body up into a sitting position. Turning his head he could see the remenants of another swirling vortex. The purples and green's intermingling and fading just like-  
No. He refused to think or even look at that.  
Arms were wrapped around his chest and a face was pressed into his neck. He stiffened as warm, liquid pooled on his collarbone before sliding down into the thick fabric of his coat. A sniffle and the smell of the sea let him know who it was.

_"Roxas?"_

**"You!...YOU IDIOT! How COULD YOU! You promised me! You **_**Promised!"**_  
Loud sobs interrupted the words and blonde spikes entered his vision.

He reached around twisting and turning so that Roxas faced him, sat on what was left of his lap and wiped the tears that were spilling over. He ran a gloved hand through the hair, it wasn't just blonde, it was brown and gold and honey and... his own eyes watered. He'd never see it again. He'd never be able to look into those eyes, _God, those fucking amazing eyes_, never be able to place his hands on the rosy cheeks, which once flushed with innocence now blanched, never be able to press his mouth to those tempting lips again. Never again.  
He could feel hands moving up his back, across his neck and into his hair. He sighed, so much for not having him see me like this, and locked eyes.

**"Why-why'd you have to be the one...to...why can't...I don't want...this isn't FAIR."**

The jumbled speech was slurred with body wracking hiccups and whimpers that caught in his throat becoming harsh and mocking sounds.  
Roxas pulled himself closer to him. He could feel the others heat. He was always so warm.  
However, loking down Roxas felt the numbing cold and watched as more flames emerged from the body under him. He reached with his right hand keeping his left hand entangled in the locks of hair. Fingers wrapped around the flame and a cool sensation ran down his arm. He watched as long, thin fingers followed by the rest of a hand encased his. The cold faded once more regaining warmth. The flame had gone.

_"I know I promised but, you think you can forgive me? I didn't want us to go like this" _

**"No! Be-Because you're going to LIVE! I'm going to help you or so help me die trying! Axel! Please! You're the only thing I have and want. You're the only one who could make me forget about Sora, about the dreams about everything!"**

_" I wish I could keep you from that. That'd be my last wish if I ever got one. I'd wish for you. For you to keep going on strong. Keep stopping the Organisation. Keep stopping the Heartless. Keep fighting for the ones who need you."_

**"But I need **_**You**_** Axel! I don't care about the rest. Sora's there. Sora's always been there. He got the life, the heart, the love, the happiness. And that was fine! I had all of that in you! I don't care! Please Axel! Please don't wish for me! Wish for US!"**

Axel tilted his head to the side. And smiled a crooked smile. If he wasn't fading, he looked at his now vanishing thighs, then he would've laughed. Maybe picked up Roxas and spun him like he used to. But No legs meant no dancing anymore. No Nothing anymore. His grin faded as Roxas stood up and reached out his hand. Confused Axel placed his hand on top and allowed himself to be pulled vertical and held.  
This was akward. He couldn't feel his legs and yet he was in mid-air he looked down. The flames had spead faster. He hadn't noticed. Why hadn't he noticed?  
Roxas pressed a hand against Axel's chest. Just as he thought. Axel's torso had gone numb. He was loosing Axel. He'd be nothing but a

_"Memory. A part of your sub-concious, a play by play movie? I can still read you like Zexion can his books, don't you dare forget me. Got it Memorized!"_

The passion in which Axel spoke shone though as the flames turned from their onyx into a rush of burgandy, orange, yellows and reds. The colour of His fire. Ironic.  
He laughed and cried. He's being killed by the one thing he's killed many with. Himself.  
Roxas wiped the tears, ignoring the ones on his own face and entwined his hands with Axel's. He kissed the palm and wrist before tucking them tightly under his chin and screwing his eyes shut. If he thought this was a dream, maybe he'd wake. His eyes opened. Flames licked his cheeks and his mouth opened with a muted horror. Where Axel's chest had been just a few moments ago was now a swirling mass of reds and blacks. He sobbed.

**"Axel...you're fading away too fast! I can't..don't know...How do I save you! AXEL!"**

A weak chuckle and a tear drenched kiss was pressed against his forehead.

_"Nothing. Nothing can change this...I'm sorry Roxas. So sorry..."_

A sharp intake of breath and a tightening of jaw, alerted Roxas of Axel's final moment. Tears prickled at the corners of his eyes. Spilling over and taking the path already ingraved down the albaster cheeks.

**"I don't want you to go."**  
_"I don't want to go."_  
**"Don't! Stay with me!"**  
_"Wish I could. I'm sorry Rox."_  
**"Stop apologising! Stop talking! stop...FADING"**  
_"Heh. I don't think I'll be here much longer.."_  
**"Don't say that. Don't Say it. .**_**Please**_**. Dont Leave me alone" **

More broken sobs broke through. Creating a harmony of sounds. The tears which dripped fell into a bittersweet song and merged into each other. A whisper was passed followed by a whimper a shake of the head and another whisper in response.

**"I'll See you again. In the next Life." **  
_"Silly. Just because you have another life."_

Roxas looked into the face of the nobody that had scorched his place in his heart and watched as he was being ripped apart piece by piece infront of him. He was a bearer of two keyblades! That had to count for something! A low murmur broke him out of his musings only to see Axel's chakgrams laying innocently on the floor.

_"Look after them?" _  
**"Always." **  
_"Remember me?" _  
**"Every second." **

Jade eyes locked with cerulean and softened. A smile played around the corners of his mouth which he pressed against Roxas' before pulling away and resting his own forehead against his lover's.

_"I love you" _  
**"I love you too." **  
_"Forever right." _  
**"Yeah. Forever." **  
_"Good to know. I love.."_

Roxas stood muted by the last flame which engulfed the last of Axel. Blurring his features and breaking him apart for good. He didn't know what was Axel and what was flame. He didn't want to.  
He dropped to his knees infront of the chakgrams and let out a pitful wail. His tears falling onto the weapons and falling off.

Another portal opened. Hope blossomed in Roxas' chest. That'd be Axel. Saying his usual apologies for being late and then he'd grin and Roxas could do nothing but forgive him.  
He didn't expect to see those blue and yellow shoes walk through. That outfit of blues and yellows and reds becoming visable. Those easily recognised spike of brown hair. And that keyblade.  
Sora.

He pushed himself back on his feet, wavering but standing. Picked up his own keyblades in one hand and Axel's chakgrams in his other.  
He stepped towards Sora. Each step he glowed brighter until he was there no more.

"Roxas?"   
_"Please just let me sleep. That's all I want. You can use my keyblades and my power, but please don't make me forget him." _  
"Goodnight Roxas."   
_"Thanks Sora." _

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Kingdom Hearts does not belong to me.  
Neither does Roxas or Sora...although I DO cosplay Axel haha 8'D

_This is on my DA/Deviantart page as well with the same title. But it's got my uber awesome Axel picture ;D [It was my very first time drawing anything like it and very very first time using a computer program to actually edit it xD] SinnerFromHeaven~That's me :)_

So I hope you enjoyed it! It was a spur of the moment thing so sorry for any spelling mistakes although I have tried to take most out!

Lex  
xx


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